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Sunday, March 9, 2008

Pac-10 Refs: 2, Northern California: 0

"So this is what it sounds like when doves cry."

I have to admit, as much as I loved to egg on Stanford, I really did think that the Cardinal got a little screwed over in that game against UCLA. The Pac-10 officials had claimed they made the right call, but even admitted that it was a bit “game inappropriate” to make the call with so much on the line considering that the foul Lawrence Hill made was a bit hard to spot.

I felt pretty bad for the Cardinal. Then, two seconds later, I came to my senses.

Flash forward to Saturday, when Cal and UCLA squared off. I wasn’t really expecting anything big from Cal. Our at-large hopes pretty much had flown out the window after the sweep given to us at the hands of the Washington schools. Even though I’m a Cal fan, I really had no invested interest in the game, and the only reason I was watching was because it was either the game or Sex in the City on TBS. Seeing that I did not have a vagina, I chose the game.

Needless to say, as the game progressed, I was rather surprised that Cal got the lead early in the game, and maintained it until the half. Sure the 7 point lead wasn’t as dominating as the 12 point lead that Stanford had on Thursday, but this was Cal playing, so I took what I could get. I was pretty optimistic that maybe we would upset UCLA, and that I could finally write something about Cal basketball not relating to how god awful Ben Braun is at coaching or the lack of skill our Asian basketball players posses. However, in the back of my mind, I was still a little skeptical when I realized UCLA came back on Thursday against Stanford. To make it worse, I realized we were no Stanford.

As the second half got underway, UCLA slowly came back, but not as strong as they did against the Cardinal. In fact, up until the last shot, UCLA never had the lead. Up by 4 with 1 minute left, I felt pretty safe. Then….. it happened.

Kevin Love hits a 3 with 31 seconds left. Shit. It’s ok though, we’re still up by one. Ryan Anderson dribbles and gets some contact in the corner. The ball goes out. Phew. That’s a foul if I’ve ever seen on. Wait, isn’t there supposed to be a whistle blown or something? Where is it?? WHERE IS IT???

What?!?! No foul, what the hell!!!!! Steve Lavin is parading his mouth like a chimpanzee asking where the foul was. Replays show that Ryan Anderson totally got mobbed as the ball left his hands. Even then, if it wasn't a foul, it seemed that the ball came off a Bruin, not Anderson. Man.............

Naturally, like they did against Stanford, UCLA takes the opportunity and makes another miracle play. I’m not going to go into the details of Josh Shipp’s last shot, because you probably have been hearing all the ESPN, CBS scrotum slobbering that has gone on over that highlight.

As I said in the other post about UCLA’s win: “The players shake hands and start heading to the locker room. You hold your head in disappointment and all you have is Jack Nicholson’s smug little face to look at, which is never comforting. The only thing you ever see in Jack’s face is him slowly undressing you with his eyes. It’s pretty creepy.”

Fuck. And don’t forget the trumpets:

Whomp, whomp.

This is no knock to UCLA. They made the right plays when handed the chance to make them, but the point is that they never should have been handed those moments in the first place. That leads to the question that everyone is asking: What Pac-10 officials are UCLA blowing in order for things to go so swimmingly for them? First they call a foul when they shouldn’t have, then they don’t all one when they should! And the better question is who are they going to blow when the NCAA tournament comes around? Hmm….

"That's Billy Packer, by the way."

Perhaps my animosity to UCLA is indeed misguided. They are not the enemy, they’re just a pawn in the grand scheme of things. There’s always the age old conspiracy that lurks around when any favorite gets calls thrown there way. One has to wonder if the Pac-10 is just trying to pump up UCLA’s resume as they head into the tournament. After all, a UCLA upset before the big dance would certainly give the Pac-10 nothing to win. We do, after all, want to look like the best of the best comes from the Pac-10, and a number 2 seed sure doesn’t look very noteworthy.

Actually, this goes beyond the scope of the Pac-10. Like a good Cal alum, I’ve come up with a conspiracy theory to explain this officiating mess. We’ve already established that if UCLA looses, the Pac-10 looses. Let’s take it beyond that. If the Pac-10 (the toughest college basketball conference in the land) looses, all of college basketball looses. And if college basketball looses, America looses (honestly, what’s more American than March Madness). And if America looses, the terrorists win! Noooooooooooo!

Who’s the mastermind behind all of this?! Well, also like a good Berkeley citizen, the monster is always in the form of one man:

"That's George W. Bush, by the way."

So there you have it, the reason why UCLA keeps getting all these miracles is because freedom is at stake. I guess I can live with that though. Besides, if Cal had won, Ben Braun probably would still be our coach next year, and if that happens, the terrorists really would win.

From Around the Blogs:
The Pac-10 helmet schedule [Bears Necessity]
A really great "There Will Be Blood" parody [Cousins of Ron Mexico]
Indiana's Eric Gordon vs a Billy Madison reference [Why Don't We Get Drunk and Blog?]


Ace of Spades said...

to make matters worse, NCAA rules doesnt allow shots to be made from behind the backboard, which Josh Shipp's shot clearly was.

Talk about home court advantage...

KC Cal said...

Actually, the shot from behind the backboard can be made as long as it doesn't touch any part of the backboard. So I guess it was legal. Those calls though.... not so much.

Ace of Spades said...

nope haha ncaa rule 7, section 1, article 3: "the ball shall be out of bounds when it passes over the backboard from any direction."

booya!! haha